Lucky

very often that i get a bit of jealous when seeing girls around me have the chance to dress themselves up. look good. look cute. look pretty. look astonishingly beautiful. look presentable, sweet and bla bla bla. my eyes would quickly glance at these girls from head to toe, from hair to the heels. i inspect and observe everything of these girls, and slowly i envy them.

why?

cause i wish i can be like them, but yet i can't.

i love dresses. i love mini skirts. i love baby-tees. i love formal attire. i love casuals. i love jeans-wear. oh, i just love clothes.

but i can't possibly have much of them - not as many as other girls my age would have.

cause i have more needed and important things to buy or pay : the house. food budget for the whole month. toileteries. savings. pocket money for my bro and my grandpa. and in the end, i only have a bit of savings for my future plans.

make-ups? oohh. i love to see the styles, the colors; how the colors blend into each other and transform an ugly duckling into a super hot model-faced girl. i've seen that.

but i can't possibly be putting on make-ups too - not possible like other girls my age should have.

cause i have the slightest idea of how to apply make-ups on my face. i only know how to put on eye-liners and lipsticks. most of the time, i just go along with being natural. absolutely nothing on my face - neither a simple eye-liner or a smack of lipstick on my lips. and again the same reason comes into consideration - money. i need to pay for lots of things. to buy a simple make-up for myself, i need to think hundred thousands of times and find myself not buying anything.

heels and handbags? God! which lady doesn't get crazy with these two most important accessories? not to mention jewelery too! these 3 things will complete a girl's attire. makes the dress or attire looks more presentable, or sweet, or just plain nice to look at. i do love to have handbags, a huge collection of heels and other types of footwear, and massive collection of jeweleries too.

but again, it's impossible for me to have those.

reasons - money. money. and money. and oh, i always have this attitude when im about to buy something - will this thing very practical to me? is it worth the money? is it long-lasting? yes, i think like a cheapskate. i think, like an old lady.

another reason why i can't possibly put on nice clothes, presentable make-ups and dashing accessories is that because i work in a technical operation team. means, i do maintenance and technical jobs. means, i need to be comfortable for me to move around and do jobs. and practical too. and not worried about getting my hands or clothes dirty.

so, i keep myself plain and simple. other than the above matters, i don't have problems being plain. and i feel more comfortable being plain. i don't feel ashamed wearing just jeans, t-shirt and a pair of flipflops to the shopping complexe.

cause what's important to me, my Hubby doesn't mind. he loves seeing me plain and comfortable.

he loves to see me without make-up cause he loves natural beauty (that doesn't mean i am naturally beautiful)

he just loves me the way i am. im lucky. nuff said.